Have you ever found yourself thinking about someone a bit more than you’d like? In my previous posts, I talked about serial dating and my newness to the process. For this reason, Danielle had me rethinking the process and considering monogamy with a pregnant chick.

A pregnant chick?

Boy, you have lost your mind.

I can hear grandma now.  Her tutelage reverberating in my ear as if she was standing side-by-side with me. Maybe it was my conscious. Perhaps it was just my inner Spidey Sense tingling and telling me to leave this one alone.  Regardless, I was not listening to any of the aforementioned advice. The spell I was under had me abandoning all logic.  As a result, I was out there like the Serpent and the Rainbow under the spell of a voodoo priestess with the power to steal my little post-teen heart.

 

She’s Showing

2nd Trimester, and we’re still talking. Ok, I’m lying we were doing more than that (don’t be a judge). Baby bump showing like fat rolls under a slim fit tee shirt. Furthermore, she’s still going home to see her baby’s father. When I saw her, the guilt was obvious like excessive plastic surgery. Consequently, In my mind were constant thoughts of them together. The obsession was really real.  I remember sitting on my stoop at the north dining hall reminiscing about our times there together. Then, twin comes walking up.  Remember, this is called Chronicles of a Former Serial Dater. So you know I wasn’t dating one woman right? I also told you that Danielle made me want to date her exclusively.

But…

I never did that.  Actually, I continued to see different women. There was no way I was [not] putting all my eggs in one basket.  Besides, I couldn’t possibly take a pregnant woman seriously.

She was playing a game of checkers, and I was playing chess. I knew the rules, and while she jumped one of my kings in the process, I was on to her strategy. Eventually, I came to my senses and that’s where Twin came into the picture.

In the event, that Danielle happened to pop up, I was ready with a whole explanation (just because).

That being said, I really didn’t care.  My confidence was arrogant level and I honestly didn’t know this many women would be interested in me. Of course, I was feeling myself. Wouldn’t you be at that age? Of course, I was a serial dater and wasn’t changing that title any time soon.

 

Black Women, Black Men Aren’t Intimidated (by you)

 

Twiny Twin-Twin

Nerd, gamer, super social, and possessive.

Did I tell you that I attract a lot of possessive, stubborn and curly-haired types? Twin was another in a long line of women that did not like any other woman I talked to.  Most of all, she didn’t like Mr. Serial Dater anywhere near Danielle.

Before I continue, I would like to tell you a quick story.

I used to be a man that felt as though you should date one person at a time. This was actually not too long ago. However, after a long conversation with an associate of mine, I began to recant my thoughts on this topic and understand why [some] people date multiples. I also remembered back to when I did the same thing in college.  That being said, I wasn’t dating for a relationship. I was dating for fun. So, it was a little different than what I’m describing below.

Serial Dater

Both serial and exclusive dating have their pros and cons.  Without going into an exhaustive list of reasons, I believe initially, serial dating is the best option.

This is a far cry from where I was about a year ago on this subject. I was adamant about dating one person at a time.  I believed it was a part of the process from healing to marriage.  Furthermore, this is what I used to practice for years (after the serial dater chronicles of course).

For this reason, I made my change.

One must traverse the dating landscape in order to understand what is out there. Especially if you haven’t dated for a while. Most notably, divorce, long-term relationship, or maybe you simply took a break to find yourself. Coming back to dating after a long hiatus can be shocking to the system. It’s best to “test the waters” with your toe in the shallow end.  Versus, taking the plunge into the deep end of exclusive dating from inception.

Quickly partake in the deliquescent and intoxicating essence of dating to your own detriment.

 

Back to Twin

Remember the stoop I would frequently squat on like the steps of a New York City brownstone? The same stoop Danielle and I would spend time confabulating.

Yep, that one.

I was sitting there one day when Twin walked up… and then Danielle followed shortly (baby bump and all).  The drama that ensued from that point was newsworthy.

You see I didn’t feel like I needed to explain anything to Danielle (although I did). I didn’t owe her anything — and Twin made sure I didn’t clarify one thing.