I am the type that loves love and relationships. I hate the dating part though. It’s this awkward space full of getting to know someone and that does not always happen easily. I like things that happen organically and naturally. So now at 37, I find it both irritating and aggravating to have to navigate the waters of dating.

The dating world is full of Netflix & Chill, and role-reversal. It’s actually quite confusing.

The truth is, I’ve never been good at dating. Men nowadays want to do the least and get the most it seems. I’m a connection and conversation type of girl.  When it came to my standards and building standards about how I want to date, I started thinking about all the things that I learned about dating over the years.

I had this boyfriend in high school. He was a bit rough around the edges, to say the least, but he was one of the sweetest people I knew (he would not want me to openly admit that to people). We were the total embodiment of opposites attract, but we got along so well.

He always took me on dates, and he paid every time. So, this one time, I thought, “I’m going to pay,” because I was a renaissance woman, and had my own money right?


We pull up to the theater and I practically jump out the car to go get the tickets. He would always hand me the money to go and pay for the tickets while he parked and this time I did not want to take the money. The car had barely come to a stop before I jumped out. I run up, pay for the tickets, feeling good about myself. He meets me at the ticket window, I flash the tickets, and he grabs my hand and we walk in and enjoy the movie.

He still hadn’t said anything about me paying. I thought I had been triumphant.


Read more


*** At 38, looking over the horizon at 39, I still cosign the ideas in this article 🙂

Don’t forget to comment below!